The promises of Life and Death

By -

 

I am living on borrowed time,

And as I lay on my bed,

I wonder if life and death are pre-decided,

Am I destined to die today?

Or am I destined to die tomorrow?

Has my number come yet?

Or do I get to live on?

I am glad it was me,

It was me rather than my loved ones,

Because if I had to watch the light go out of my life,

I hope it would rather be mine,

Because I can’t watch the light go out of my life,

And live with it.

I can’t watch the flames of the pyre,

And then go back to live.

I don’t have that strength,

I don’t have that courage,

I am selfish with my sorrow,

I would prefer to set myself alight,

Rather than watch my loved one being set alight,

Because I can’t keep living,

Not after the person who made me whole,

Left me broken again,

Time heals scars,

Cliched but true,

I wonder how long will I have to wait?

As my world comes crashing down.

 

I pray for strength and fortitude,

For the ones who might have to live without me,

When it had struck,

I had prayed,

Let it be me,

Rather than them,

For I am old,

They still have to live,

So young and full of life,

I wish them resilience,

I hope they keep my image in their heart,

And keep going,

I shall watch over them,

Wish them happiness,

Ghost over the tears on their cheeks,

Wanting to wipe them off,

I want to touch them,

Savour the last moment of skin-to-skin contact,

Because I don’t know when I shall be privileged enough to feel it again,

I want to warmly hug everyone,

Pepper the faces of my loved ones with kisses,

The stolen cuddles were really stolen from me.

 

Stay courageous is the easiest thing to say,

Except for the person really trying to stay courageous,

I won’t give you these paltry condolences,

Fake promises and empty words,

Please weep to your heart’s content,

Till it feels all right,

For you have the right to mourn,

Right to contemplate the unfairness of life,

But promise me,

Promise me that you will move on,

And stay courageous,

For me,

For my soul,

For my happiness.

 

--

Stay safe and take care everyone. I hope my poetry and stories can bring you some source of comfort in these troubling times... And if they do, please let me know, for they really help me to keep writing as I wonder about life.

Location: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India

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